5 Tips To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back

18 Sep 2009

879 Comments  get your ex boyfriend back



kissing coupleXSmall5 Tips for a Second Chance

No matter how hard you try to accept the fact that it is over, you just cannot embrace it. You have decided that whether it works or not, you want to try to get your boyfriend back. The empty hole in your heart will never heal if you do not at least try. If you try and fail, then you will have to accept the fact that your relationship is over, but if you never try, you could never live with yourself. So here are some things that you may want to consider as you think about how to get your boyfriend back.

  1. Sit Still – Take a minute to assess what just happened. Do not do anything especially if every fiber in your being wants to call, call, call him. Think about the reasons that he had for ending the relationship and decide if you both have a chance at a good relationship, and be honest with yourself. So first of all, give him a minute to miss you and do not call, text and email.
  2. The Mirror – So, to keep yourself busy while you are NOT calling him, take a look at yourself. Where can you improve, and we are talking about behavior here, not looks. Take account of all of your sad and negative feelings and find a constructive way to deal with them. You can write a long letter and blather on and on about how unfair and hurtful he was to you, or about what you will do differently, whatever is eating at you can go in the letter. Then read the letter, have a good cry and set it on fire. That is right, on fire. As the last puffs of smoke swirl up from the ashes, let all of your negative emotions go with them.


  3. Be Positive – Surround yourself with positive thoughts and people. Do not trash talk your ex boyfriend and encourage your friends to also be positive. They will follow your lead, because they want to support you. So insist on constructive and positive discussion. Remember why you loved dating him, and focus on the good memories.
  4. Grow – Continue to focus on your strengths while working on your weaknesses. If you are artistic, take a painting class or sculpting class. Develop your strengths so that those talents blossom, and address your weaknesses so that you as a person experience overall growth. There is something intoxicating about a person who is living and growing in a positive way. Your ex boyfriend will notice this and wonder why he ever left.
  5. Be Social – After you are done mourning your breakup, it is time to get back out in the social world. Be ready to mingle with your friends. If someone asks you out on a date then go, and have a good time. You will always want to have an active social life, and you can invite him to be a part of it. That way whether or not he takes you up on the invitation, you will still be growing and thriving as a positive person.

As you go through your days being positive and happy, your ex will wonder what he was thinking to let you slip away. When he does ask you out, go slow, and give your new, positive self enough time to enjoy the journey for the second time.

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Winning Back Your Ex Even If He Wants More Space

12 Aug 2009

862 Comments  Uncategorized


Regardless of his reasons for telling you that he wants more space, your first outward reaction should be one of respecting his wishes. Deep inside you may feel upset, confused and rather emotional. If you are hurting because you truly love this man, you will respect him by giving him his space initially. You’re lucky, in reality, because he doesn’t want to break things off for good at this point. So don’t give him reason to do that and you’ve got the best opportunity for winning back your ex.

Author of The Magic of Making Up, T. “Dub” Jackson, gives readers a step-by-step program to rekindle the flames of a love once thought of as lost. The following tips culled from his book are particularly noteworthy.

  1. You may not want to lose any pride, but worse, you don’t want to lose his love altogether. Give him his room to breathe. Play a little bit hard to get. At first, don’t always be there for him if he calls. Keep yourself busy with other friends and activities and he may come to the conclusion that he desires you more than ever.

  2. If you know that your ex-boyfriend still feels love for you, you should communicate with him on a platonic level. Friendship is the virtue that has staying power. Communicate in short, sweet and kind messages through brief telephone conversations, text messages and email. Invite him to go out with a group of friends to an event in which he has a major interest. Through this method of keeping in touch, he will remember how much fun he experienced with you in the beginning. Don’t overwhelm him and he may realize how much he wants to be a part of your life again.
  3. When he seems ready to get a bit closer to you, on a different level, this is the time to reminisce about how much fun you had with past experiences. Remember the good times and laugh … a lot. Avoid the negative experiences. If a negative experience surfaces, show him that you’re a well-adjusted woman and that you’ve learned how to let things go. Life is too short to focus on the negative. 
  4. If your ex-boyfriend becomes more distant to you, then you must give him his space. Tell him you want to be friends. Tell him you think that spending a significant portion of your life together meant something to you and a friendship is better than no relationship at all. The space that your ex-boyfriend desires can be a learning experience for you too. You’ll have the space to see things from a distance, which may give you insight into the relationship that you did not gain prior. 
  5. If, indeed, your ex-boyfriend is beginning to show that he cares deeply again, share with him how you feel. Talk openly and candidly, but avoid desperation and over-the-top emotion. Show him how well-grounded and mature you’ve become. If his body language and mannerisms prove that he still needs space, give it to him in a friendly way and allow a more natural movement for the rekindling of love to occur. 

Space in a relationship can be a breath of fresh air for both parties. Taking the time to step back and gain insight is very healthy. It is NOT the end of the world, or the relationship. Leave the door open for a lasting friendship, and true love may be returned to you.  

When you’re ready to get all the details of winning back your ex then go check out T. “Dub” Jackson’s book The Magic of Making Up.


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